Should’ve gone sailing

A lovely dusk reminds me of a dusky love.

It’s there but it’s not. You know what I mean?

Like there’s light somewhere but it’s just a reflection and not the actual source.

Upon keenly observing every man over 5’10 for a familiar face. The issue is that I know that I won’t see that face again even if see it, for seeing needs time and intention. The issue also is that I don’t ever want to see that face seeing someone who’s not me. It’s a selfish intention, I’m aware of that but you know what justifies it? The fact that I have to bear all this alone. Hence, it’s left up to me, however ridiculously I imagine.

Sometimes I wonder if I am looking for something that doesn’t exist anymore and that hurts me more. It’s like that light you know, you’re seeing it but it doesn’t exist.

Also, should’ve gone sailing.